RROD (Random Rant of the Day)

My random rant of the day deals with those security codes at the bottom of every web page. I have often bragged about the fact that I have perfect vision and perfect hearing. However, the web security gurus who want to protect us from unwanted people logging in to the recipe for clam chowder on a blog no one ever reads decided to put my vision and hearing claims to the test. I often wonder, is that a 6 or a G? What kind of word is vghestible? Should I enter the space, or should I write it with no space? After clicking ‘refresh code’ several times, I sometimes decide to have the jumbled mess of words read aloud to me. It is then that I discover my hearing may also need to be retested. It sounds like a call center in central India in the background with one person speaking into the dollar store microphone a series of letters, numbers, and symbols. At this point, I usually give up and move on to a game of Scrabble from a site that doesn’t feel the need to be compared with the Mona Lisa by employing the top security available to protect their valuable chowder. I didn’t need those extra calories anyway.

My Book! My Book! My Book!

Well, it is now out there for the whole world to see. The process of writing a book was so much fun, but I feel suddenly very vulnerable. People I don’t even know will be reading details about my life that few have heard. Here’s the overall gist: If you are young and you want to live anywhere overseas for any amount of time, this book is for you. If you want to study abroad, take a gap year, go on a crazy hike through the Amazon: this book is for you. If you want advice about making a long distance relationship work while living abroad: this book is for you. If you have dreams of starting a new life somewhere over the rainbow… you’ve got it – this book is for you. So do a new author a favor, and buy a copy! Thanks.

www.page23press.com or find it on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Home-Where-Plane-Lands-Adventurers/dp/1469910160/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1329582927&sr=8-1

I did it!

I am turning 30 in three days. I’ve been anxiously awaiting this day for awhile now, but I am mostly excited for what the next chapter in my life will have for me. 2011 was not the best year for me or my family. We had a lot of tragedy and unfortunate events, but I am confident 2012 will be a much better year. For starters, I finally finished my book. It was my goal to finish my book before I turned 30. After contacting countless numbers of publishers and agents, I realize that my genre is not one that does well by publisher standards. In addition, it was never my intention to become a best seller. I simply wanted to have that accomplishment of being an author. Therefore, I decided to self publish. I am proud of what I’ve done, and I hope that some people will find the information helpful. When it become available within the next month or so, I will post a link here for everyone to see. Thank you for all your support!

mañana, mañana, you’re only a day away… not.

Because I’ve been overwhelmed by the lack of time in my life lately and underwhelmed by the money in my bank, I took it upon myself to go back to school in the fall. I figured with a doctoral degree I would make more money one of these days. The whole time thing though- that is only going to get worse temporarily. Being a full-time mom, working full-time, trying to write a book, and getting my doctorate full-time=insane. Oh, and my husband works nights and weekends so, yeah.

What does any of this have to do with overseas life? Well, my long-term goal is to become a principal in an international school. Why? Because a) I love education and being a teacher has always been rewarding for me, but it is time to focus on leading teachers and b) I need to live a life where time is not of the essence. Even as an administrator overseas, I have this crazy notion that I will have more time to focus on the things in life that really matter.

See, here’s the thing about time abroad. It just seems to dissipate. Along with time, worries also scatter, dissolving into the wind. Regardless of where I ended up, I never seemed to focus on the clock. Even the bigger cities like Paris and Sydney offered me respite from obsession with my watch. It is because many cultures understand the importance of soaking it all up, stopping to smell the roses, carpe diem… and all that other stuff that metaphors are made of. Not only do they get it, but they encourage others to get it too. Think about it; Mexico has their siestas and their popular mantra of mañana, which we all know doesn’t really mean tomorrow. It simply means, whenever I can get to it. The Middle East has a fabulous phrase: Insha’Allah, or God willing. God willing, things will get done. But they don’t have to get done today. The sense of urgency is really only such a priority in the western world. But why? What’s the rush? Just some food for thought.

I promise, I’ll write more mañana.

 

 

Picture

I wanted to add that the picture at the top of my blog was taken after a day-long hike in Ethiopia. As the sun was setting over the mountain, I reflected on the fact that I accomplished something that I would have deemed impossible a year earlier. Travel does that to you; it helps you conquer the difficult and appreciate the extreme.

Independence

In honor of my home country’s Independence Day, I am giving you an excerpt from my book, Home is Where the Plane Lands. It explains a little about the fact that although I left, I still love my country.

There are some Amish groups who encourage their teenagers to experience something they call Rumspringa. At the age of 16, they can experiment and explore the outside world without the fear of reprimand. The desired outcome is that they will taste modern life and realize all they truly want is their Amish life. I love the basis behind this concept, although I personally have found it difficult to return to my old way of life. There are bits and pieces of the average American adult lifestyle that completely appeal to me. At times I long for the big cookie cutter house on a cul-de-sac with a willow tree, a tire swing, and a picket fence. I think of what it would be like to retire from a school where I had been teaching for thirty years or going to the neighborhood cook-outs on the Fourth of July. I especially think about what it would be like to have the same best friend my entire life. I moved a lot as a child and sadly did not maintain close relationships with my childhood friends. The problem I have with all of that is that it fences me in to one particular path. I need options. I need change. Suburban America does not offer enough change for me. Most of the Western world feels safe in that fact. Living in the same routine day in and day out is comforting to most people. From a very early age, we experience a tight schedule and strict routine. Schools are the best example of this. Knowing what to expect is calming for children, and it reduces behavioral problems. But all of a sudden, at the age of 18, we are thrown into a world where no one tells us what to do, where to be, how to dress, what to say or not say, what to read, where to live… We experience our own Rumspringa. Most of us eventually return to the drill; working 9 to 5, spending weekends working on our lawns, and taking the occasional break from reality by going on a cruise. This drill continues until we hit a midlife crisis, retire, or die. If you find yourself questioning the validity of this drill for your own life, I can relate.

I did not leave my country because I wanted citizenship in a new country. I love America. I love the freedoms we have, and I appreciate them even more now that I have experienced cultures with little to no freedom. I left America to escape my problems, but I soon found out that problems are inescapable. One must change who they are before they can see who they are.

 

I have about two more chapters to complete before I’m finished with the first draft of my book. I’m writing it as a guide for young adventurers who want to study or live abroad. My little sister is currently going through what I went through at her age. She’s spending the summer with family friends in a small town in Mexico. Although it is difficult for her, I know that it will ultimately prove to be a life changing event. Chin up, Elisa!

Fear of Failure

How many things would you have tried if you were incapable of being afraid? What could you have accomplished if you knew you couldn’t fail? What is it about fear that cripples us so? Fear of failure is something I’ve struggled with many times. Before embarking on a new adventure, I begin to imagine the worst case scenario. But what if I imagined the best case scenario? If you haven’t traveled abroad because you’re afraid of what may happen, or you’re afraid that you’ll fail at whatever task you’re presented with- just stop. Stop the negative thinking and realize that life is an adventure. Make the most of it without letting fear stop you.

Pickthebrain.com, has an article describing 7 ways to overcome fear of failure. You can read the full post at: http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/overcome-fear-of-failure

Why we should travel

Because yesterday’s blog post had a quiz that was biased for women, I’ve decided to post something from askmen.com. They listed the top ten reasons that men should travel.

Number 10- Meet new people

Number 9- Eat new food

Number 8- To think on your feet

Number 7- To buy some sweet gear

Number 6- To achieve a big goal

Number 5- To challenge yourself

Number 4- To make yourself more interesting

Number 3- To appreciate your hometown

Number 2- To develop self-confidence

Number 1- To see the world differently

To read more of their article, go to: http://www.askmen.com/top_10/travel/top-10-reasons-all-men-should-travel_1.html

I think these are great reasons for anyone, male or female. I believe the best reason to travel the world is definitely to change your perspective, or to see the world differently. It’s a gift that many people never get, or are never willing to accept. Accepting that the world has so much more to offer than what you know if the first step to changing your life.

Risks

I love reading research studies. I’m a bit of a nerd in that sense. One research study I read a few months ago (and can’t find now!) described the personal characteristics that people find attractive in their future potential mates. One aspect of this study focused on risk-takers. The study found that risk-taking was an attractive quality if based on altruistic, heroic, or intelligent risks.

This article instantly sparked my interest because I’ve always considered myself a risk-taker. I’ve been known to say things like, the biggest risk in life is not taking any risks. I think that many, if not most, expats are risk-takers. Why else would we leave it all behind to have some kind of adventure in a completely different country?

So if I am a risk-taker, would I be considered a part of the altruistic, heroic, or intelligent categories? Perhaps. But, do others see me that way? Most of my non-expat friends think I fall into the crazy category. Or the “well, good for you but I could NEVER do that” category. What are my intentions behind my risk-taking? Is it because I have a deep need to prove to everyone that I have no fear? Is it because I want to prove to myself that I can take on any situation? Whatever the case, I know that I will continue to take risks in life, because it keeps me feeling young, it encourages intelligence, and it gives me the character I need to face everything else in life.

Do you consider yourself a risk-taker?

Below is a link for a fun quiz to see how much of a risk taker you are:

http://www.nicolewilliams.com/connect/quiz-are-you-a-risk-taker/

The trailing (male) spouse

In honor of Father’s Day, I wanted to write about my baby’s daddy, my husband, Rob. He’s always known that I have this thing where I can’t stay in one place very long. Call me a gypsy, call me a nomad, call me crazy. I haven’t really been able to commit to much in life other than him. That’s why the expat lifestyle was (is) so attractive to me. I asked him the other day if that was a character flaw. I’m doing some serious life analysis at the moment, and I’m trying to find ways to improve myself. That’s always been one thing I really don’t like about me- my addiction to change. Completely expecting him to tell me that yes it is a flaw, I was shocked when he told me that that’s just who I am and he loves me the way I am.

I have no inkling of what it’s like to be a man. Nor do I have any inkling of what it’s like to be a man married to a woman who is always looking for ways to pull up roots. Two years ago when we had our first child, I accepted a teaching position in the UAE. Rob has always loved his job. He’s an actor. He gets to make people laugh every day and gets paid to do it. I know I broke his heart a little when we made this decision, because it meant him having to leave his job. But the good news was that he got to be a stay at home dad. How many dads out there get to do that? How many dads get to bond with their newborn son the way he did? I am eternally grateful that I married the kind of man who was willing to be a “trailing spouse” to be that dad and that husband. I am grateful that he dragged me out of the house sometimes when it was 110 degrees to explore the desert. His charm exudes from his very being, and he quickly made more friends abroad than I did. He gave up his job to let me have mine.

Now that we have temporarily returned to the US, fate was kind of Rob. He was able to get the exact same position with the same company when he returned. That time we spent together abroad was so special, not because of the locale, the food, the desert camping, the geocaching… No, it was special because I got to share it all with the best dad and the best husband anyone could ask for. Happy Father’s Day to all you great dads out there.

Rob and Logan at the Burj Khalifa in Dubai